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the same one

I stepped out into

never as old as my 20 years

turning my back on college

saying  Hallo! to the roving life

and took to falling through the towns

this is the same now

for the sparrow and

the dirty deaf-mute 

pleading from his eyes like a symphony

this is the same now as when you learned

falling in love is easy

but getting along a contest

between endurance and contention

the same now for the junkyard

and the pampered

gila monsters and train conductors

one blinking once one clicking

10s of tickets every hour

it’s the same now we lost you, Dad

and the same one you come back

but are gone again

the same now bouncing from

Hong Kong to Texas

with a digitally decaying

cell phone laugh


for Natasia


this is that now

the same one we drove into

that Ashram in the mountains of Colorado

completely unbidden or intended

beneath the fat, squatting Buddha

in our flyswat rental

his smile peaks wide

the impossibility of our love blooming

fighting at camp that night

and destroying everything back in Philly

that statue could sense my guilt

like he knew all our futility

we’d never make it, but try and get there

peel webs and cataract of karma

open our arms to each other

but never really hold anything

except that now,

the same one--

this is that now

and even this one

we notice

and it’s gone.

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